It Echoes
by The DarkCat
Summary: Soubi takes Ritsuka to an abandoned house, where Soubi's fears and memories came to manifest.


_hello, I finally finished something..._

_I __havn't been writing much these past months, thought of entering Camp NaNoWrimo this month, but other plans rose up, (a small poetry competition in my city, that's less than two weeks from now,) so anyway, see you later._

~~~X~~~

He had done this before. Many times, over and over again. In these passing years, this place had turned into his personal haven and a source of inspiration...

And once again, like all those times before, the fifteen-year old Soubi stood in front of an abandoned, timeworn house, that was hidden by aspens and guarded by widely spread shrubs. They masked the entrance and clingged to the walls like children. The branches used them as if stairs to climb higher and to be closer to the sun's warm rays, their true mother. So the decaying wooden construction was just a stepping stone, it seemed. But the sun was ignorant to the pleas of nature, turning a deaf ear their way. And so the warmth was still quite weak, even though it was already well into Spring.

Soubi turned to glance at the clearing of the forest behind him. Only the shivering hay responded to his silent question. Nobody had followed him. Good. The boy sighed, wanting to calm his hammering heartbeat a little. He hadn't believed it to be possible. He was plagued by constant anxiety nowadays. Although he still hadn't grew accustomed to the loud pumping of his heart and the occasional sting in his chest.

The light-haired teen took a deep breath and tried to ignore the unpleasant feeling. It was fine for now, no one knew of this place. And it would be better to keep it a secret from others, from his peers, teachers and especially Ritsu. He hadn't wanted them to know. He hadn't required any more gossip, sneers, or name callings, Soubi was sure, he had more than enough. He needed quiet, peace, solitude. And this house, hidden from prying eyes, served that purpose wonderfully.

The boy suddenly gripped the canvas in his hand and fixed the backpack's strap on his shoulder with the other. The light rummage was heard as he did so, those were drawing supplies. Tubes, housing various colors, a palette, all kinds of brushes, a water bottle, and a glass - that was everything he needed in life, if only he could live off it, if only nature could give him strength to paint eternally, without any distractions, or any other needs and especially with no people.

Soubi evaded and pushed the branches apart, yet they were persistent to return to their designed territory, bouncing back at him. So they ended up scratching his cheeks and forehead. After a couple of steps, the boy stopped, then trailed a hand on his face in thought. He hoped, that action hadn't left any scars, Ritsu-sensei would get pissed again. And of course he would question, where had the boy been. But Soubi had to remind himself, that he came to this abandoned building to draw, not to dread the upcoming. To the teenager's fortune, the branches, that had been closer to the door weren't that strong and broke with a soft crack from Soubi's force.

Once he parted the creaking, half fallen in door, he was met with the similar dusty atmosphere, that the boy had left, the same shattered windows and the household junk thrown around, the familiar burnt hole in the ceiling. It had invited even more light to the room, as if into the ball, where the dust danced until the sun set each day. The remains of the ash colored planks and brown tiled roof shown through this gap. They were barely holding up, and the wet, slowly decaying planks were deformed, sunken. This happened because of the constant rain, that dribbled onto the naked wooden boards, that had been without the roof's protection.

Soubi smiled to himself, before skipping through the glass shards and torn out floorboards. After a minute the teenager was in his lucky corner, which he had cleaned up a few weeks ago. He also set a few boards against a deformed bookshelf, it acted as a support for the canvas, while an old red carpet imitated a cushion for the boy to sit on.

The boy kneeled in front of the linen, ogling the white fabric for a few good minutes... Unfortunately nothing came to mind, he couldn't imagine, what colors should create a background, he couldn't see the details spray themselves in his mind. His thoughts were completely blank. Soubi emitted a sigh soon, leaning at the wall. He felt his fingers become stagnant, and unable to clench into a fist, they always returned to their previous position like a piece of gum. He heard a distant heartbeat invading his brain, beating in a steady rhythm, was it his own? Or was there someone else beside him?

Soubi tried to shake the uneasiness, no one knew he was here, there was absolutely no one beside him. In so the blonde let his eyes slowly fall shut and escape the menacing light. He straightened his back afterwards and began to breath deeply through his lips.

Perhaps meditation will clear his mind and give him ideas and the drive to paint. It was Soubi's first time actually trying it, but he had heard, that a lot of other fighters practiced it, and their teachers always encouraged the act. Soubi had came in contact with such a thing, when one teacher of Seven Voices had held a meditation session, and nearly forced Soubi to join, babbling without a breath to spare. The latter had declined. So after that event, the boy was skeptical of meditation. He had thought, that it turned people into jabbering machines. Ritsu had stayed silent on the subject of meditation too, and the light-haired teenager hadn't wanted to pry and start a conversation on something, that his sensei might see as a waste of time.

But now, Soubi seemed to be a little more open to the matter, at least he wanted to give it a go, before actually judging. So his breathing stabilized and for a couple of minutes, that seemed to last for an eternity, he listened to his own respiration. It had became boring, and his mind started to wander.

He imagined a huge mountain. It penetrated the sky and was surrounded by a white, thick layer of puffy clouds. They looked like cotton candy. The visible snow, that mixed with that ivory substance, seemed like dripping vanilla, it scarcely revealed the grass and rocks underneath.

Down the mountain slithered a little path as if a snake, that had partaken in the sugary feast. Or perchance he was banished from ever tasting it? Maybe that snake was thrown out of the sky, and out of his safe, warm home or even his blissful, unaware future? He was forsaken by the heights, never destined to meet his family again, and now had to slide down a different route, an altered, hurtful and unkind future.

_Why_? Why was he... Thinking about that?

Soubi's brows furrowed on impulse.

The scenery began to mingle, the sky was overtaken by a darker shade, which hid the mountain... The soil blended with the sky. Everything got blurry, dim, distorted.

And now, a new imagery was being molded, or set like a stage for the artists to play. The teenager saw a grey ceiling, and thought, that he was laying in bed, under warm covers, his head sunk into a soft pillow. He didn't feel content however...

Shadows... Like puppets on strings, they danced to their silent rhythm. The shade of swaying branches and leaves curiously poked into the huge room as if seeking to find someone. Wherever he lay his scared eyes upon, he found them mocking. There had been no escape for him...

"No. Not that..."

Like banshees they beckoned with a melodious voice, that was carried by the night's gust, sweet like honey, sharp like a razor. They were searching for children, who could not sleep, who were frightened, and offered their motherly services: singing lullabies, telling gorgeous tales, caressing with the shadowy arms on the walls, until the victims would join them for a warm hug outside...

"No..."

Those creatures dragged their fingers further and further, scrapped the wall, and showed the path to their lair... Their movements lost grace all of a sudden, they swayed hastily accompanied by the rising squeal of the maddening wind. Perhaps they were even angry at him for being indecisive?... Only one thing was clear to the teenager, they were in fact desperate.

_'How nice. Now you too can be put into this grave.'_ A bitter voice suddenly clicked open...

"Please, no... Not that..."

Soubi was wrong. Indeed, those banshees wanted him to join them, but not there... They wanted to reunite the boy with his parents, below the soil...

"_No_..."

Soubi couldn't take a second further, in so the teenager forced his eyes apart; As if on cue the darkness slowly dissipated in his vision. His muscles felt stagnant, his breathing - heavy. He won't meditate ever again. Soubi didn't need any more remainders of the past.

X X X

\- Present-

"Wait. Why are you only telling this now!?" Youji barked at Soubi from the table. The blonde man shrugged absentmindedly, standing near the doorway.

"That's kind of sneaky don't you think, Youji?" Natsuo leaned over the table, where his brother sat, and held a wicked grin. Youji nodded and the red-haired boy continued, giving his brother the recently peeled apple slice." He's taking Ritsuka somewhere for the day, but leaves us here... Huh. Doesn't seem fair to me."

"I call veto!" Youji stood up dramatically, while still munching. Soubi shook his head and said.

"Listen, Kio will come any minute now. You'll have company... Just don't mess this place up."

"Boring!"

"And don't set any traps, Youji."

Youji's cat ear twitched at those words, he snickered to Natsuo. But Soubi didn't bother with the obvious ill intent, instead he gave a little wave their way, before exiting the apartment in a hurry.

Again it was the middle of Spring, similar to the other ones, that had passed all those years ago. The nature was slowly and perhaps unwillingly waking up from slumber. This was proved by a sharp, yet refreshing breeze, that scratched at his face. Pleasant chirrups reached his ears as well, though his eyes couldn't make out the birds, that had such wonderful voices. Unfortunately, they couldn't nest here, there weren't many trees, that surrounded his apartment. Finally after his pleasant observation, Soubi's eyes landed on a being, that made him all the more happy. Ritsuka was already waiting for him outside, down the stairs. The boy gave him a questioning glance, while periodically clenching the backpack's strap with his one hand.

"I'm sorry, I kept you waiting..." Soubi immediately apologized. That caused the teenager's cat ears to perk up.

"N... No, it's alright..."

"But there is something on your mind, isn't there?" Soubi guessed, as they went to his car. Apparently his presumption was correct, because Ritsuka didn't decline. In so the light-haired man smiled, turning to face the boy." Don't worry I'll get you home before your curfew."

"I know, that you will... But you still haven't told me, where are we going."

"Oh. So you don't trust me, Ritsuka?"

"No..." The dark-haired teenager broke the eye contact, letting his unfinished phrase fall into silence. In the meantime Soubi unlocked the car." It's just not fair to keep someone in the dark..."

"That means, you don't trust me..." The blonde sighed, returning to his previous statement. And the boy's reddening cheeks responded better than any words. The teenager's syllables would deny his emotions, but his expression always showed the pure truth. Soubi's smile grew wider, spotting the effect. Honestly the beautiful emotions, blossoming on Ritsuka's face were the greatest reward Soubi could ever get. Soon enough he patted the boy's head softly.

"I'm sorry. I'll tell you, we're going to Goura..."

Ritsuka gazed back at him with the same confounded look. Although before the boy could ask, Soubi spoke up.

"We are not visiting Seven Voices..."

"Then..."

"This trip is a surprise, so have patience. You'll see."

X X X

... How everything changed...

Soubi swallowed, before averting his eyes to look at the damage again. He had to. Eyes were meant to intake a scenery and their nerves had the responsibility to carry it to the brain for analysis. Still he wished, that the image would be purposefully dropped somewhere along the way, because otherwise the blonde would be cursed to recall the horrid view. An unnerving feeling gently climbed up Soubi's throat, when he set his now wet eyes on the remains on the house.

A few walls, fully hidden by bushes, stood like guardians of long passed as if lonely reminders... In the perimeter of those walls, piles of debris were decaying with the help of the never stopping time. How Soubi wished he could turn it back, just for an instance, so he would be able to see the house for a short while.

Ritsuka stood next to his fighter. The teenager's curious eyes traced every corner of the remains, before he timidly clutched the edge of Soubi's sleeve.

"Soubi, are you okay?"

The blonde, in question, strained his shoulders. After a pregnant pause he managed an insignificant nod.

"I am..."

"You don't look that way to me..." Ritsuka admitted, then faced the other man fully.

"You shouldn't worry... It's just that... This place brings back some memories... That's all."

"So that's why you brought me here?"

"Kind of... I understand it's a terrible reason... And it's selfish. I'm sorry..." Soubi bit his lip. Ritsuka noticed, how his fighter's shoulders tensed after that, making him straight. Uneasiness was written in that stance, he looked like a statue. Was Soubi dreading some unpleasant action? Was that how he acted with Seimei around? Time was flying by them, with every second, a fresh gust of wind ruffled their hair. It was never the same, it never came back for a greeting like an old friend. How easy, Ritsuka thought. So if the universe was moving without a care, why couldn't Soubi let go of the past. Why were humans and nature so different?

Soon Ritsuka mustered a gentle smile.

"I don't mind, so don't apologise."

Soubi nodded in return. Then he took a timid step towards the house and the crunching sound below his feet invaded his ears. Not anticipating the unwelcoming rustle, Soubi paused, he didn't move forward anymore, letting out a sigh. What that action meant, Ritsuka couldn't decipher, although his eyes caught the recovering features of the man's body: still shoulders, arms pressed at his side and tightly pinched lips, as if trying to contain a hideous beast inside. The same sculpture was born into life...

"Are you scared of something?" Ritsuka let his wonderment dwell on the outside.

"No."

"I think you are, Soubi... Your front let's out too much." Ritsuka turned to him fully. He hoped, that it wouldn't seem too commanding, his voice already betrayed the boy with the hidden eagerness. No, he closed his eyes, he won't demand - he was not Seimei... However Ritsuka wanted to know, if there was something he could do, the dark-haired teenager wanted to help. Yet Soubi evaded eye-contact. And Ritsuka eventually whispered. "Do you not wish to talk about it?"

A temporary silence settled. And the question remained swallowed by the wind, carried away. On one hand, Ritsuka thought, that this silence between them was calming, on the other, he was still curious about Soubi. Soon enough the gentleness was broken by a manly voice.

"This place... This is where I used to draw... And take inspiration from."

"Ah... You are changing the subject..."

"Hear me out, Ritsuka. If I would know, what I'm scared of, I'd tell you... Perhaps..." Ritsuka's cat ears flattened at that. And Soubi chuckled dryly in response, before patting the boy's head." The thing is, I'm not sure, what caused this uneasiness. It just rose from the pits of my stomach suddenly. So don't worry..."

"That's not a reason to leave it be..." The teenager side stepped further away from the blonde's reach zone, with slightly reddened cheeks and disheveled hair.

"It's how a person views this fear that also counts..."

"What?" Ritsuka frowned, planning to come closer to his fighter. Although Soubi was the one to step away this time. He smirked, standing just a few inches away from Ritsuka, while holding his now sweaty hands tightly clasped behind his back. After a short pause, poisoned by bafflement and disbelief, the boy called out and began to move again. "Hey, Soubi... I just wanted to..."

And so it continued. Once the boy would get closer to Soubi, the man would jump away, keeping the permanent distance between them, and the smirk, which separated him from the boy's grimace. Their expressions weren't contrasts though, they were alike, these emotions were made from the same mask and divided into a pair, two opposite sides of the senile creation.

"Why would you want to keep something negative in your heart? That sounds absurd. Don't tell me, that you brought me here, just so you could indulge in this suffering?... That's stupid Soubi..."

"Perhaps..." The blonde mussed, jogging over the pile of debris, surrounded by the three walls.

"Now, I've got you."

"I'm afraid so..." Soubi's eyes glinted, as he saw the teen stand in front of him. The dark-haired boy didn't come closer though, retained his position as if it could be stolen and ripped away from his feet. He ducked his pupils away from his fighter, examining the fallen out crumbs of bricks and the rotten, mossy planks underneath... It seemed, that someone had wanted to renovate this house, alas was too late.

After a few quiet minutes Ritsuka murmured. And Soubi had to strain his ears to hear the lonely word that escaped.

"Why?"

"I don't know, Ritsuka... This feeling... of fear and... anxiety, it follows me around... Always did, always will... Even when I was a child, something about this place drew me closer. Yet sent chills down my spine every time, that I had entered it... As if telling me, that I'm crossing a line... that I shouldn't be walking into this house so easily. An invisible string bonded the two, the afterlife and this very place..." Soubi carefully rose his hand to grace his fingers on the wooden construction next to him, feeling every curve, every light tickle of the moss, and the softness of the decaying material. Ritsuka on the other side stood wide-eyed." But at the same time the fear brought shimmers of hope, serenity, compassion... I'm still not sure, what I felt here... But it could be identified as home."

The teenager parted his mouth to say something, but found himself unable to form a single sentence, as if there had been a lump in his throat.

Soubi smiled at the boy's silent reaction, then climbed down the small mountain of debris, as if leaving the stage... As he did, a thought crossed his mind. What prompted him to spill this? The man hadn't planned to lay his heart out, this act of opening up, seemed unnecessary to him, meaningless and stupid. In that moment, Soubi met the young boy's stare with a dry gulp and new sets of worries. He cursed himself mentally, what in the world will Ritsuka think of him now?

Alas his rising anxiousness, a memory breached into his mind.

X X X

The blonde-haired teenager rose the brush, watching, as it made contact with the canvas and overtook it, coloring the spot in a warming shade of teal. His hand once paused, now made a gentle motion, leading the brush along like a dancer. Soon Soubi sat back, leaning at the wall, while adoring the wholly colored canvas. With this, the background was done, now he just needed to fill in the details of the painting.

Though before he could grab his palette ready to mix the colors, his ears picked up the crunching of leaves somewhere in the distance. Soubi listened them for a while, his hands set on the ground, if the boy would need to run.

"What are you doing here, kid?"

A gruff tone echoed, rendering goosebumps to Soubi. And soon enough a voice called out to him again. A dreadful eye was peering through the partially opened door. It could never close, so that was what gave the boy in. From that view Soubi was wholly visible. He sprung upwards, then suddenly got hold of the window frame in order to climb through.

Somewhere in the bottom of his mind, the boy foresaw, that this blissful escape couldn't last forever. His haven was going to be exposed sooner or later. Still, it was not fair... And he couldn't accept it as an ending, he couldn't abandon his new found home, his freedom.

Tears began to drip from Soubi's eyes as he ran into the forest, barely avoiding the sprawled roots in the grassy bedding. Suddenly he heard the, presumably Septimal Moon's, guard's footfalls behind him and a muffled utterance, that the boy barely registered, due to his own deep and erratic breathing. Soon enough the hysterical beats of the heart intermitted his focus. His vision, that had been already blurred from the tears, now doubled, obscured and failed to see a sneaky obstacle straight ahead. Soubi's leg hit a stub, making him stumble.

From then on a blurry wall closed off the many paths in his brain, and the boy didn't recall anything in his sleep like state... His mind cleared after some time, and Soubi found himself in an infirmary bed. The teenager's pupils lazily took in the familiar scenery, while he pondered how he got there in the first place.

"Ah, there you are, Soubi-kun..." A displeased voice seeped in, making Soubi instinctively clench his ivory cover. If he wouldn't have heard that menacing voice over a ton of times now, he would have missed the sarcastic tone, that bit by bit poisoned and soaked his bones. He wished, that he would have been still a child, who didn't pay much attention to those sort of things. Yes, he prayed to forget, that atrocious knowledge one day. It just made him want to crawl into his own skin.

"Soubi-kun..." The voice was persistent, the owner - too, obviously." Why had you gone there?"

Soubi stayed silent, he knew, that talking back to him in this situation was useless. Yet the tall silver-haired man emitted a displeased breath in his stead.

"You're just like your mother..."

Soubi perked his ears at that, though held his head down, afraid to meet the other's eyes. And the teacher took that moment to continue, albeit his voice got somewhat softer.

"She used to spend a lot of her time being in that abandoned house, when she was still alive. But you don't have that time. I don't want to see you leaving Seven Voice's gates from now on. Do I make myself clear, Soubi-kun?"

"Yes. Sensei..." Soubi gritted through clenched teeth. The teenager wanted to disobey, but that was pointless. He wanted to scream at the teacher, but lost his voice. He wanted to run away, to isolate himself from the selfish beings, called humans, who only caused him pain... The last option was indeed possible, it didn't took much effort. So why hadn't he? Soubi always told himself, that he only needed his drawing supplies and nature to survive... Then why hadn't he jumped through this first-floor window, right at that time, without a moment to spare? It was that simple.

It's because Soubi's theory was flawed...

He needed other people, he required connections, caring. Human interaction was vital for these beings, that he despised so much... And unfortunately Soubi was no different from them, with the same desires, urges...

The boy speculated the shadow, that had befallen him so silently, the tall figure, stood in front of him, glaring from above and locking the teenager in a metaphorical cage.

Maybe Soubi was the forsaken snake from his daydream after all...

X X X

"Soubi?" A hint of puzzlement was evident in Ritsuka's voice, as he peeked behind the wall. Soubi was sprawled away from the house's remains on the widely grown meadow bedding. The blonde was keeping his hands' fingers entwined and resting on his abdomen. He had been lying there for some time now. It seemed as if Soubi was dead, his motionless composure was constantly tickled by the stale strands of overgrown grass, making them seem like annoying pointers, yet he paid no mind. The man continued to stare upward into the blue sky, though the view was regularly concealed by the swaying hay around the man and the tree branches high above him.

"Soubi?!" Ritsuka had grown worried, making his way toward the still man, who's only movement seemed to be the fragile quivering of the parted lips. The boy kneeled near him, beginning to tug at his shoulders.

Soubi frowned, while his body was being swayed slightly. He was unhappy, the dozing off was cut off. So he sighed with a dry throat.

"Damnatio memoriae."

"I... don't understand."

"Damnatio memoriae..." The blonde repeated the statement to Ritsuka, this time raising his finger and pointing at the nearby tree. The dark-haired boy's eyes followed the indication, and the sight made him agape slightly.

The side of that tree's trunk was carved out with those exact words and a few more below them, they seemed to be edged in long time ago, along with ornamented chirography.

_Damnatio Memoriae;_

_Vel non;_

Ritsuka scrutinized the unfamiliar writing for a minute longer, until he raised an eyebrow in confusion. He had no idea, what language was that, nor did it look like Soubi's writing. The boy had seen the man's lettering from the numerous times, when they had been in Soubi's apartment, both occupied with their respective homework. Though Ritsuka had to admit, that most of his concentration in those days had been wasted in steeling glances at the blonde male, who had been sitting next to him. From those many experiences the raven-haired boy was sure, that he could pick out Soubi's writing quite well. He gave a peek, at the idly lying blonde now. It wouldn't hurt to ask, just to let that possibility dwindle.

"Soubi, did you wrote this?"

"No." Came a quick answer.

"Well, do you know who did, or what does it mean?"

"No..."

"Are you laying?"

"Perhaps..." A teasing voice proclaimed again, while Soubi watched the passing clouds. And his body eventually betrayed him with a shiver, the breeze was periodically rising and falling, the earth itself was still suffering the aftermath of Winter's coldness, it was not warm in the least, but Soubi tried to ignore it as much as he could. Soon enough Ritsuka sat next to the blonde, pulling his knees to his chest, and laying his chin on top of them. Soubi saw how the boy's cat tail swayed and lurched - proof, that the boy was still angry...

Soubi lifted his upper half up, leaning the weight on his elbows then. The deceitful smirk, that the man had desperately held on to, disappeared, he bit his lip instead, still mulling over his upcoming action. The desire itched in the back of his throat. He knew this was wrong, but voicing the problem didn't seem proper either.

"Ritsuka..."

"Hm?"

"No. Nothing, forget, that I said anything."

"Geez, Soubi... If you start speaking finish it. I heard you, so there's no point in putting this act.." Ritsuka muttered, burying his head on the knees in defeat. Until he felt a slight nudge on his shoulder, that caused the boy to look up at the blonde, tiredly. Soubi's expression portrayed anxiousness, and to Ritsuka's surprise he added.

"We have to go," Soubi stood up momentarily, and extended his hand to Ritsuka " There's no point in being here... We don't belong here."

"What?" The teenager looked back at him then, feeling a harsh draw upwards, after he took the arm. Soubi held on to it, and because of that Ritsuka could feel the scarce trembling, that the blonde's palm produced.

"Let's go home... I don't want to be here, or dwell in this past anymore, I don't want to relive it, but there is still something, that keeps pulling me back... Ritsuka, can you at least promise me the present?"

"Ah... How should I? If you are afraid, that I'll leave you, I can assure you, that I won't..." The dark-haired teenager stated timidly, uncertain of his answer, or if the blonde actually cared for an answer.

Even if time seemed to stop for Ritsuka, the wind kept blowing. It pierced the remains of the house, carrying the decayed fragments to an unknown destination. This home had once offered peace and protection, inspiration and escape, now it slowly fell apart. And the memories resurfaced for a dance in Soubi's psyche, mesmerizing, they pleaded for the past...

After a while Soubi eventually gathered the words to speak, while staring somewhere in to the endless forest, and seeing nothing at all.

"Then... Ritsuka... If you will be willing to hand me the present, I can promise you the future. So you could one day stop living in the past too..."


End file.
